A marriage is sacred based on the principle of bible and should be a lifetime journey for the two person who get in into it. As you have said on your vows during wedding day you said that in sickness and in health, for richer or for poor you will be together as husband and wife.
But there are circumstances that really happen that could shaken your relationship and it is not because of sickness and money problem, its maybe because of betrayal when someone found another person to have illegal affair.
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Since none of us are able to read minds we can never truly know someone. On top of that people change over time, so the person you fell in love with may be someone entirely different today.
Even if you both love each other, times change and you might grow bored with the same old routine. This is the reason for most affairs, one spouse simply grows tired of the dull routine and wants to try something different.
While it is far from acceptable it is understandable and understanding is the first step to healing your marriage. While a lot of people would end their marriage after this act of betrayal, people often still love each other and might want to salvage their relationship even after this mistake.
But how can you trust them ever again after they back stabbed you like this? You swore to be faithful and they went off with someone else. Well there are certain things you can do to help mend the wound.
First of all, do not accept excuses. Just because you are willing to forgive and move forward does not mean you should just forget it and let them off the hook. They screwed up, big time, and they need to own up to their mistake for your relationship to work. If they want your relationship to work then they will do this, otherwise they may not be as serious as you are.
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Another part of not accepting some half hearted apology is to remember the old saying "actions speak louder then words". If your spouse is truly sorry and wants to make amends, they will cut off all contact with the person they cheated with.
If they refuse to do this, or continue to see the person, then they probably are not as sorry as they led you to believe and you might want to simply cut your losses and move on with your life.
Also, do not belittle yourself. A lot of people blame themselves for their spouses affair, thinking they must have done something wrong to drive their partner to such lengths. Do not do this, it was their mistake not yours. If they had a problem they should have talked with you about it instead of running off into someone else's bed.
Lastly, whether you forgive them or move on, always hold your head high. You are not at fault for this and you deserve better. Whether you get that from your spouse or someone down the line is up to you. There is no law saying you have to stay with them if they refuse to change. Be understanding and cooperative, but never be a doormat.
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As long as you try your best to make things work, and as long as your spouse realizes their mistake and tries as well, things will often work out in the end.
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Thursday, September 8, 2011
How to Apologize To Your Boyfriend When Somethign Wrong Happen
Relations require a lot of work and can be wonderful things. But sometimes we can argue and have fights. When this happens both parties get mad at each other and there is obvious friction.
When this happens you probably want to apologize to your boyfriend. Whether you were to blame or not sometimes it is good to just say sorry and move on.
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If this is the case you may asking yourself how you go about apologizing to him. Well there are a number of things you can do to Say sorry to your boyfriend and to make it seem sincere.
If you do not apologize after doing something wrong it could severely damage your relationship. Even if you do not break up it can put a very big fissure between the two of you and cause a lot of tension which will just build up until the next fight.
Saying sorry to your boyfriend can be hard, especially if he was at fault. But even so there are things you can do to help make it easier and increase the chances of him accepting your apology.
1: Make sure to give him some space. Sometimes people just need to be left alone to be mad. If you try to act too soon it could just spark another fight and undo all your efforts. So giving him some time to cool off can greatly increase your chances of success.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
2: Let him vent. This is another important thing you have to do. Even if you give him some space and try to talk, he might start yelling again because he is mad. It is human nature to get defensive and retaliate when threatened. Resist this urge as best you can. Let him yell and get it all off his chest, listen to what he has to say. He will calm down and be more willing to talk it over with you.
3: Be sincere. People can pick up on subtle traits and body language which can give you away if you are lying. If you are sorry then say sorry, otherwise it might do more harm then good. Apologies only mean something if you actually mean it.
4: If all else fails, come up with a more long term plan. If nothing you do seems to make a difference, and you are serious about saving your relationship, then you may have to take the high road and work at it. Do not become pushy or needy in any way, shape or form. It is human nature to withdraw or retaliate when pushed so if you try to pressure him about saving the relationship or about how you will change, it will only put him off.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
As well avoid any and all arguments. Even if it means being a little yes man and agreeing to everything he says. He needs time to come around and you have to walk on egg shells during this period.
But do not confuse that with becoming a doormat. If he takes advantage of your behavior and tries to milk it for all it is worth, then you might not be able to salvage your relationship. There is walking on egg shells and then there is allowing him to take advantage. You have to draw the line and if he takes too long, you may want to just walk away.
When this happens you probably want to apologize to your boyfriend. Whether you were to blame or not sometimes it is good to just say sorry and move on.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
If this is the case you may asking yourself how you go about apologizing to him. Well there are a number of things you can do to Say sorry to your boyfriend and to make it seem sincere.
If you do not apologize after doing something wrong it could severely damage your relationship. Even if you do not break up it can put a very big fissure between the two of you and cause a lot of tension which will just build up until the next fight.
Saying sorry to your boyfriend can be hard, especially if he was at fault. But even so there are things you can do to help make it easier and increase the chances of him accepting your apology.
1: Make sure to give him some space. Sometimes people just need to be left alone to be mad. If you try to act too soon it could just spark another fight and undo all your efforts. So giving him some time to cool off can greatly increase your chances of success.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
2: Let him vent. This is another important thing you have to do. Even if you give him some space and try to talk, he might start yelling again because he is mad. It is human nature to get defensive and retaliate when threatened. Resist this urge as best you can. Let him yell and get it all off his chest, listen to what he has to say. He will calm down and be more willing to talk it over with you.
3: Be sincere. People can pick up on subtle traits and body language which can give you away if you are lying. If you are sorry then say sorry, otherwise it might do more harm then good. Apologies only mean something if you actually mean it.
4: If all else fails, come up with a more long term plan. If nothing you do seems to make a difference, and you are serious about saving your relationship, then you may have to take the high road and work at it. Do not become pushy or needy in any way, shape or form. It is human nature to withdraw or retaliate when pushed so if you try to pressure him about saving the relationship or about how you will change, it will only put him off.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
As well avoid any and all arguments. Even if it means being a little yes man and agreeing to everything he says. He needs time to come around and you have to walk on egg shells during this period.
But do not confuse that with becoming a doormat. If he takes advantage of your behavior and tries to milk it for all it is worth, then you might not be able to salvage your relationship. There is walking on egg shells and then there is allowing him to take advantage. You have to draw the line and if he takes too long, you may want to just walk away.
Marriage Life After Adultery
Saving a marriage after adultery can be a very hard and time consuming process. You spent all that time together, loving each other and pledging to be faithful to each other only to have that trust get betrayed. Most marriages end after an affair because it is just so hard to ever trust that person again.
Despite having an affair, some couples still very much love each other. Affairs are nothing more then a symptom of a deeper underlying problem. The first thing you need to do is find out what that problem is, what is causing you to stray from your marriage.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
The thing is that as we get older we change and we may acquire different tastes or grow tired of the old. This is where affairs usually take place, once the marriage has settled into a routine and the offending party simply grew bored of it all.
It is understandable, if not acceptable, why the offending party would cheat under those circumstances. As cruel as it may sound, we all grow bored if we do the same thing over and over again. This applies to marriage just the same as it applies to everything else.
The first thing you need to do after adultery, if you wish to save your marriage, is to forgive the offending partner. This likely will not happen over night and it will be very hard. They betrayed your trust and it will take a lot of time and effort on their part to earn it back.
But once you have forgiven them, you can move on to fixing the underlying problems that led to the affair. This is a crucial step. If you do not fix the problem them history will likely just repeat itself. So it is vitally important that you find out why they cheated, really get down to the root of the problem.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
Once you have discovered what exactly it was that drove them to cheat, you can work on fixing it. In most cases an affair happens because one of the people involved has grown tired of the routine sexual activities. If this was the case then you might want to sit down with your partner and discuss ways to spice up your love life.
If you can just make changes to the areas the offending party has grown tired of, it can go a long way to prevent them from every straying again. So if it was them growing bored of your love life, then make sure you fix that and talk with them about it.
If it was not something related to your love life, then it may be trickier to fix. Even if this is the case the fundamental points still hold true. Talk with them and find out specifically what they thought the problem was, and why they cheated. From there you just have to make steps towards changing those aspects.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
No matter what the case may be, life after adultery can be hard and emotionally taxing. What you need to remember is that you should always do what is best for you. If you feel you can forgive them and continue loving them despite their betrayal, then go for it. However if you do not feel you can forgive them, do not feel guilty or ashamed, they betrayed you so it is your right to walk away.
Despite having an affair, some couples still very much love each other. Affairs are nothing more then a symptom of a deeper underlying problem. The first thing you need to do is find out what that problem is, what is causing you to stray from your marriage.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
The thing is that as we get older we change and we may acquire different tastes or grow tired of the old. This is where affairs usually take place, once the marriage has settled into a routine and the offending party simply grew bored of it all.
It is understandable, if not acceptable, why the offending party would cheat under those circumstances. As cruel as it may sound, we all grow bored if we do the same thing over and over again. This applies to marriage just the same as it applies to everything else.
The first thing you need to do after adultery, if you wish to save your marriage, is to forgive the offending partner. This likely will not happen over night and it will be very hard. They betrayed your trust and it will take a lot of time and effort on their part to earn it back.
But once you have forgiven them, you can move on to fixing the underlying problems that led to the affair. This is a crucial step. If you do not fix the problem them history will likely just repeat itself. So it is vitally important that you find out why they cheated, really get down to the root of the problem.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
Once you have discovered what exactly it was that drove them to cheat, you can work on fixing it. In most cases an affair happens because one of the people involved has grown tired of the routine sexual activities. If this was the case then you might want to sit down with your partner and discuss ways to spice up your love life.
If you can just make changes to the areas the offending party has grown tired of, it can go a long way to prevent them from every straying again. So if it was them growing bored of your love life, then make sure you fix that and talk with them about it.
If it was not something related to your love life, then it may be trickier to fix. Even if this is the case the fundamental points still hold true. Talk with them and find out specifically what they thought the problem was, and why they cheated. From there you just have to make steps towards changing those aspects.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
No matter what the case may be, life after adultery can be hard and emotionally taxing. What you need to remember is that you should always do what is best for you. If you feel you can forgive them and continue loving them despite their betrayal, then go for it. However if you do not feel you can forgive them, do not feel guilty or ashamed, they betrayed you so it is your right to walk away.
The Importance of Respect and Trust in Relationship
It is human nature to be socializing and having friends or be with someone. People do not like to be alone by themeselves thus everyone are looking for someone they can be with in their whole life. There are some relationship edicate that we have to observe, otherwise our relationships may take a turn for the worst.
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There is the golden rule that is applicable, do unto others as you would have done to you. Basically if you would not like being stood up on a date, or being lied to, it probably is a good idea not to do these things to others.
Always show respect for others, respect and trust are the foundation for a good, long lasting relationship. If you do not respect the other person, you will probably not treat them as they deserve to be treated. Since people do not like being mistreated or looked down on, your relationship most likely will not last.
If you do not trust the other person, this as well can lead to problems. Trust is paramount for a proper relationship since if you can not trust them, then how can they be considered a friend or a lover?
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
Relationship edicate extends beyond simply showing respect and trust. Like all forms of etiquette there are various things you should observe. Just as you should use the proper fork at a fancy restaurant you should make sure to abide by social rules as well.
A relationship is a give and take ordeal, you give to your friend or lover, and they give to you. But you need to know when to give and when to take, since like with everything else there is a time and place. If you give too much you can come off as overbearing and make the other person uncomfortable.
On the other side if you take too much you can come off as selfish or needy and this will just drive the other person away. It requires proper etiquette to know how to moderate yourself properly and to achieve the right balance.
Compromise is another thing you should keep in mind. Not everyone sees eye to eye on every little thing. Compromising is what allows most relationships to work. One of you may want to see one movie, while the other wants to see a different movie. You could compromise and agree to watch one movie now, and then watch the other movie next time.
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If you can not come to an agreement that can lead to resentment since it looks as if you are simply selfish and always want things your way. Sometimes it requires one of you to step up and admit defeat. If one of you does that, the other will probably follow through.
The relationship is a give and take and you must sometimes step down or give in for the benefit of your both relationship. It is natural to both partners to have sometimes have a fight or quarrel but it shold not take too long. That is the sweet and sour of the relationship.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
There is the golden rule that is applicable, do unto others as you would have done to you. Basically if you would not like being stood up on a date, or being lied to, it probably is a good idea not to do these things to others.
Always show respect for others, respect and trust are the foundation for a good, long lasting relationship. If you do not respect the other person, you will probably not treat them as they deserve to be treated. Since people do not like being mistreated or looked down on, your relationship most likely will not last.
If you do not trust the other person, this as well can lead to problems. Trust is paramount for a proper relationship since if you can not trust them, then how can they be considered a friend or a lover?
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
Relationship edicate extends beyond simply showing respect and trust. Like all forms of etiquette there are various things you should observe. Just as you should use the proper fork at a fancy restaurant you should make sure to abide by social rules as well.
A relationship is a give and take ordeal, you give to your friend or lover, and they give to you. But you need to know when to give and when to take, since like with everything else there is a time and place. If you give too much you can come off as overbearing and make the other person uncomfortable.
On the other side if you take too much you can come off as selfish or needy and this will just drive the other person away. It requires proper etiquette to know how to moderate yourself properly and to achieve the right balance.
Compromise is another thing you should keep in mind. Not everyone sees eye to eye on every little thing. Compromising is what allows most relationships to work. One of you may want to see one movie, while the other wants to see a different movie. You could compromise and agree to watch one movie now, and then watch the other movie next time.
=>> Click Here for The Biggest Secrets of Making Your Ex Go Crazy for You Again!
If you can not come to an agreement that can lead to resentment since it looks as if you are simply selfish and always want things your way. Sometimes it requires one of you to step up and admit defeat. If one of you does that, the other will probably follow through.
The relationship is a give and take and you must sometimes step down or give in for the benefit of your both relationship. It is natural to both partners to have sometimes have a fight or quarrel but it shold not take too long. That is the sweet and sour of the relationship.
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